Saturday, January 13, 2018

Ban the Full Brazilian!

Okay, not exactly the typical posting here at Holger Awakens but consider this a new adventure into some sort of Public Service Announcement.   LOL

First disclaimer:  I do NOT speak for all men in America and have no idea what percentage I might speak for, as, believe it or not, this isn't the biggest topic of conversation for men as we sit at bars or around the open hood of a car.

Second disclaimer:  This is meant to share information with women, not piss them off, not tell them what to do.

Third disclaimer:  This is being written by a male of the Baby Boomer generation. Age IS a factor with this topic.

Ladies, it's a plea - BAN THE FULL BRAZILIAN!  In other words, PLEASE do not continue to go completely bare "down there."

Okay, now that we're over that completely uncomfortable opening salvo, let me get to the splaining part of this.  I think the easiest way to approach this is through bullet points.  And we must always keep one thing in mind, that the female form is truly one of the most exquisite aspects of G_d's creations.  But somewhere along the line, and it is my personal theory, that this was all started by some militant feminist faction, the word spread across all of the female ranks of the world that MEN LIKE WOMEN COMPLETELY BARE DOWN THERE.  And I'm here to say, from this one man's standpoint, that it simply is NOT TRUE.

Here's the list of reasons to Ban the Full Brazilian:

  • Men from my generation grew up with Playboy and Penthouse and Oui magazines.  As boys and then teenagers, we snuck these magazines into tree houses and fantasized.  Those photo spreads defined beauty and erotica, they became the gold standard and yes, in the vast majority of the photo spreads, the women were NOT bare down there.
  • From a purely physiological perspective of the MALE anatomy, there is a huge downside to the total removal of hair from the woman's pubic region.  Ladies, with the male counterpart to love making, this represents an area of skin that is THEE most sensitive probably known to the entire human race.  When we have an area of skin removed of all hair that then sees even the SLIGHTEST growth of ....let's just call it dainty stubble...we encounter a problem.  Houston, we have a problem.  We now have the most sensitive area of skin known to Man meeting an area more resembling sand paper.  We now encounter pain and discomfort.
  • Then there is the phobia aspect.  As a man, we are, thankfully, censored by the thought of the purely disgusting act of pedophilia.  Most men in this country have found themselves (uncomfortably) in the situation where they are at a beach, at some family pool party, or another venue where a very young girl is running around without her clothes on and we, as men, see this girl's form certainly long before the onset of puberty.  The instantaneous shock to our system is pronounced.  Not only do we nearly break our necks trying to look away from this but our second thought is to run away.  There is an image of BARENESS that, I believe, is intended to REVOLT us.  Thus, from an early time as a man...."bareness" is associated with "illegal", "sick" and "obscene."
Again, my theory is that the Brazilian Way was conjured up by the same people that decided it was time for men to go around in suits that were 3 sizes too small and had skinny legs.  The same people that decided that if a male wore pants so tight that eventually they would be rendered sterile.

Now I'm sure I will meet with huge backlash on this - there will be men that think Brazilian is an answer to a prayer, by women who profess this has revolutionized hygiene and women who insist this was demanded by fashion trends over the past 20 years.

But, I think there are others out there, just like me.  Men who have been too chicken, too politically correct, too spineless to actually say those four important words....."BAN THE FULL BRAZILIAN"



Henry Bowman said...

Preach it Brother H......

watsonrg said...

Also a boomer (1951). Remember and can still recall the Paula Kelly side view photo as the first time Playboy was not discreet. But I wasn't a kid in a treehouse, already eighteen.

"There is a small photo of nudists that shows pubic hair in a 1967 issue, but you need a magnifier to see it well. As someone said, African-American dancer Paula Kelly shows some pubic hair (in side view in a multiple exposure across two pages in the August 1969 issue). Miss January 1971 Liv Lindeland from Norway was the first Playmate who showed pubic hair (in a demure pose) in the centerfold. Miss March 1978 Christina Smith had the first rather splayed poses that I recall, and I have that issue. In the early 1970s, "Playboy" also published a magazine titled "Oui" (copied from the French mag "Lui") to compete with the more revealing photos in "Penthouse" and "Hustler", so that it could keep "Playboy" as it was. "Playboy" did gradually become more explicit in the poses shown as the 1970s faded away though."

Holger Awakens said...


Thanks for the excellent history of Playboy.

I'm 9 years younger than you and perhaps, at times, was a little "too old" for a treehouse. LOL (is 10 too old for a tree house?)

the Penthouse issues in 1970 did set the stage.


watsonrg said...

You're welcome, glad to contribute.

Nine or ten seems just about right for a treehouse.