My Fellow Americans,
Yep. I totally fucked this job over as President.
I admit it.
But I don't give one rat's ass about the kind of job I did for America. You see, this country of ours has been an expansionist blight upon this world since I was a child and my goal was to showcase to the world how hated we should be.
That part of my job I got right.
So, as Michelle and I get ready to head off into the sunset, laughing our asses off all the way to the bank...I'll leave you with this.
It's been worth it. Every minute of these 8 years to sit and watch your expressions as I proved that the American people can be herded like sheep and that the government can shove any damn thing we please down your throats and get away with it.
I'm happiest about never having to call you "fellow Americans" ever again.
You are chumps.
Eat shit, Fools.
Yours in Islam,
Barack
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