This is close to comedy gold, I tell ya.
The report comes from The Telegraph.
Barack Obama warns UN's failure to act on Syria will expose its powerlessness
Addressing the UN General Assembly, Mr Obama said that denying the Assad's regime's responsibility for the poison gas attack that claimed over 1,000 lives on Aug 21 was an "insult to human reason".
The Security Council is deadlocked over a resolution that would compel Syria to keep the agreement to surrender its chemical weapons. America and Russia differ over whether any draft should allow force – or other punishment – if Syria breaks the deal.
The US, Britain and France want a resolution under Chapter VII of the UN Charter, which allows the Security Council to enforce its will. However, this would not necessarily authorise military action: a resolution passed under Article 41 would only allow economic or other measures.
Mr Obama said the UN would be exposed as powerless if the impasse persisted.
"There must be a strong Security Council Resolution to verify that the Assad regime is keeping its commitments, and there must be consequences if they fail to do so," he said.
"If we cannot agree even on this, then it will show that the UN is incapable of enforcing the most basic of international laws. On the other hand, if we succeed, it will send a powerful message that the use of chemical weapons has no place in the 21st century, and that this body means what it says."
The gas attacks were launched from areas of Damascus under Assad's control, said Mr Obama, and they were targeted on rebel-held suburbs. The evidence for this came from the UN inspectors' own report, he added.
"It is an insult to human reason – and to the legitimacy of this institution – to suggest that anyone other than the regime carried out this attack," said Mr Obama.
But the president added that military action "by those within Syria, or by external powers" could not "achieve a lasting peace". America and Russia both favour a peace conference involving all parties to be held in Geneva.
Mr Obama restated that Assad's departure was essential for any settlement, saying: "A leader who slaughtered his citizens and gassed children to death cannot regain the legitimacy to lead a badly fractured country. The notion that Syria can return to a pre-war status quo is a fantasy."