Jihadi 101: Don't Hide Out In A Bear Cave, 2 Jihadis Killed By Infidel Bear...72 Virgins Cancelled

The mental imagery of this is just too much! It's hysterical! Picture this...four islamic jihadis in Kashmir are on the run...they decide to hide out in a cave and chant their 'allahu ackbars' over a nice little campfire...the owner of the cave, a Himalayan black bear comes home...isn't too excited about the jihadis turning his cave into a mosque...mauls and kills two of the jihadis while the other two finally get their wits together and escape. hahahaha!

I've been scouring the reports on this attack and haven't yet been able to find the response from these jihadis' group but I'm sure it will be out soon...maybe something like this:

"Hizbul Mujahideen leaders today announced their outrage regarding the Jewish attack on two of their commanders. Hizbul Grand Imam, Achmed Booboo, stated that the incidious attack on his two men came about as the 'Joooos' infiltrated the Hizbul camp wearing a bear suit and killed the two martyrs."

LOL.

I'm sorry...sometimes a story just makes my day. Virginia tells Barack Hussein Obama to shove it up his ass....New Jersey kicks out Communism....and two jihadis fall prey to Yogi the Bear...now THAT is a good day at Holger Awakens!

(Hat tip: SharksShakes)

From the article at India Today:

Bear kills 2 Hizbul militants in J&K

A Himalayan black bear killed two top Hizbul Mujahideen commanders in Shopian district of southern parts of Kashmir valley. Two other terrorists, however, escaped after shooting the bear.
The bodies of dead terrorists were recovered from a cave in Damal Hanji Pura forest in Kulgaam area in the Kashmir valley by troops of the 9 Rashtriya Rifles, who found several arms on them, including AK-47 rifles. The bear's body was also recovered.
The terrorists, with two other accomplices, were holed up in the cave which turned out to be the bear's den. The four men were cooking inside the cave, when the beast returned. The men were taken by surprise, and two of them were mauled to death before they could react. Another man was injured in the attack. The surviving two terrorists opened fire at the bear and killed it before fleeing.
According to army, the terrorists killed by the bear were key Hizbul operatives in the valley. They were identified as Mohammad Amin alias Kaisar and Bashir Ahmad alias Saifulla. They were the residents of Mahore in Reasi district of Jammu region and were active in the state since 1999.
Recently both militants had crossed over to Kashmir valley because of the army operations in Reasi. In the last two months, security forces have eliminated 20 top militants in Reasi. Both the dead militants belonged to Pir Panjal Regiment of Hizbul Mujahideen.