Sunday, June 20, 2010

Al Qaeda Spokesman, Adam Gadahn, Lays Out Conditions For Peace Between America and Al Qaeda - Wait! Aren't We There Now?!!!


Adam, son, you left out one condition - we get to string you up to a lamp post by your feet and let every single citizen of New York City get a swipe at your stripped down body with a belt laden with rusty nails.

But, I digress. The al Qaeda spokesman, Adam Gadahn, has again listed the conditions on which al Qaeda would be willing to declare peace with America if Barack Hussein Obama will only act. Just a paltry list of four conditions which are (from AP):


1. Withdraw troops from Iraq and Afghanistan
2. End support for Israel
3. Stop intervening in the affairs of Muslims
4. Free Muslim prisoners.


Now wait....just one doggone minute. Let me review this list of demands because I think Barack Hussein Obama almost has this baby covered.

1. Withdraw troops from Iraq and Afghanistan - hmm....well, according to the Commander-in-chief, U.S. troops will be out of Iraq by the end of 2010 and out of Afghanistan, just announced again today, starting the summer of 2011 - so hey, we're almost there Adam.

2. End support for Israel - well, let's see - Obama made Netanyahu enter the White House through the service door, his Secretary of State has condemned Israel for building any settlements and for the flotilla incident, and one of his Middle East advisors has stated that the United States may just shoot down any IAF fighter jets headed to Iran. I'd say the support for Israel is nearly gone, al Qaeda.

3. Stop intervening in the affairs of Muslims - well, now that one actually needs a little clarification, Adam. Obama considers himself the 12th imam so it's really hard for him to keep from trying to draw all of you to him like a soothsayer of the sura, but if you mean that he should not get in the way of the mullahs in Iran killing their citizenry that want to revolt, then I'd say Obama's proved he's already there on this one too.

4. Free Muslim prisoners - Adam, Adam, Adam...don't you ever watch the news, boy? Obama has nearly emptied out Gitmo and if you are asking for someone perhaps a little more near and dear to your heart there at al Qaeda...like perhaps the Sheik who planned 9/11? Is that the rugface you really want, Adam? Khalid Sheik Muhammed? Well, again Adam, you gotta pick up a New York Times once in awhile because Obama and Holder have authorized a public trial for KSM and he'll walk scot free on technicalities.

What do you think, folks? Haven't I made a case that America has met all of these conditions or is very near to it? Just think - peace with al Qaeda! We would never, ever have to worry about another terror attack on the United States for the rest of all time because Osama and Ayman and Khalid and Adam are honorable, trustworthy men, right?

Adam, I've got a revised set of conditions for you to take back to your leadership:

1. Bin Laden, al-Zawahiri, and Mullah Omar (we'll throw in KSM) are turned over to U.S. special ops for transport to the U.S. for a public execution.
2. Al Qaeda agrees to set explosives with enough firepower to crumble the mosques at Mecca and Medina.
3. Al Qaeda will exterminate the following: Ahmadinejad of Iran, Assad of Syria, Nasrallah of Hezbollah and Meshal of Hamas.
4. Al Qaeda agrees to videotape a one hour apology to the people of Israel, including in that video that you are convinced that the Jews are indeed the children of G_d and are far superior to any muslim.

If you do all of that Adam, we might let you live. Well, maybe not.



Al-Qaida spokesman sets peace conditions with US


CAIRO — Al-Qaida's American-born spokesman has repeated the terror group's conditions for peace with America, calling on President Barack Obama to withdraw his troops from Iraq and Afghanistan, end support for Israel, stop intervening in the affairs of Muslims and free Muslim prisoners.

In the second, 24-minute part of a video released in March and posted on militant Web sites Sunday, Adam Gadahn said the Democrats' loss in January of the Massachusetts Senate seat underlined Obama's falling popularity.

In white robes and turban, Gadahn told Obama: "You're no longer the popular man you once were, a year ago or so."

Gadahn is wanted by the FBI since 2004 with a $1 million reward for information leading to his arrest or conviction. He is also known as Azzam al-Amriki, Arabic for American.

1 comment:

Rides A Pale Horse said...

To quote Gen. Anthony McAuliffe who, when surrounded by elite Nazi troops at Bastogne and asked to surrender said:

"NUTS!"